GreenMcManny Solutions Limited

Green McManny of Nigeria in partnership with EIVA of Denmark launches her first of its kind SUNSHOT SOLAR POSITION UTILITY SOFTWARE. The ultimate program for gyro calibration. To order now and book for training sessions, follow link below.

The EIVA SunShot Solar Position Utility Tool meets all demands to heading sensors calibration and verification required for real-time online positioning, no matter the type of gyrocompass. Through its flexible configuration and user friendliness, it is easy to derive all observations needed to generate all results for correction calculation.

The software is totally independent of the EIVA NaviSuite or any other navigation software, which allows it to run on any windows version as a stand-alone program. The software supports for calculating data logged from heading sensors not limited to Meridian Surveyor, Alphatronics, S.G.Brown and Octans Gyrocompasses for the purpose of calibration or alignment checks.

A purchase of The EIVA SunShot Solar Position Utility Tool pack contains three non-transferrable copies of the software. In addition, it does not support any further subscription after purchase.

Nigeria: To order a copy, book the 1 day training session on how to perform a sunshot observation and calibration using total station, how to use the Gyro calibration excel sheet and for any technical support relating to this software, please email:greenmcmanny@yahoo.com

http://gmcmsl.org/?page_id=797

Banks again

Hey World,

First of let me start with saying I don't particularly have any issues with banks per se. I just happen to have some of my weirdest thoughts and encounters while waiting in line at a bank. I guess because its so boring.
Anyhooos, with that being said I would like to get a few things I've noticed recently in banks off my chest.

For example, old farts talking and playing with kids. I mean total strangers. Now, there is the 'awww look how cute that child is' comment from afar. That's OK, there should be no touching, or carrying, or poking or down right playing with the child while their momma is doing a transaction. Dude you are one smile away from getting locked up Paedophile. If you must tell a kid how fine or cute they look I suggest you pay that compliment to the parent of the child. Parents tho, it really isn't ok for an adult to be all up in your child's business, he ain't doing you a favour, he ain't keeping the kid busy while you have your hands full. You sure wont give him your Ghana Must Go filled with money to look after would you?

Second thing I notice is that how come most female Bankers are Married or Engaged or Pregnant? Like are you kidding me? I have my theories tho but before I tell you, this is all I see when I enter a bank. Most of the female staff are spotting some kind of ring on their fingers even babes that ain't really that good looking. Yes, yes, I know, I sound horrible but trust me, next time you walk into any bank branch even if its in the remotest village possible you'll see pretty much every one with a ring or very pregnant.

My theory goes thus. Either majority of them just put on a ring of any kind on the ring finger before resuming work to ward of unnecessary suitors. Maybe Banks just happen to be Cupids love pit cos if you think about it a bank has all the recipe for marriage. Babes in tight pencil skirts, killer heels, the sound of money being counted but most importantly, bank statements and account balances. Already the small talk is eliminated, no one would refuse giving out numbers or receiving and so on.

So my advice for the day is this. Forget that fortune telling babalawo that says if you bring some farm animals, grain and any kind of tuber you are  guaranteed marriage proposal, tell him to EFF off and just go to the bank. Guys you will need a healthy account tho if you wanna stand a chance at scoring. Trust me, the streets ain't smiling. So you better bring your A-Game. And ladies, if you want that man of your dreams that will cater and provide for you, go to the nearest bank and submit your CV. As for those looking to crooked pastors and their kind for babies I'm sure working in a bank is a better option than going to bar beach in the wee hours of the morning to bathe. Abi water board no dey supply your area. Enter bank, you'll be knocked up before you know it. Definitely better than sleeping with some loin cloth wearing dirty old man at least with the bank way you can tell what your offspring will be like. Give the little one a chance.

Disclaimer: I don't guarantee happiness oh, just saying that most people who happen to work in Banks hardly ever have a bare ring finger. Happiness is entirely up to you.

LDV II.

Canary in the Bank

So last weekend, there I was at one of my bank branches waiting in line to deposit some lean change and all of a sudden I hear this loud 'lalalalalaaa-mmmhhhmmmm' hum right by my ears.

I turn around startled like WTF? there is this dude right behind me who just starts singing. Low but audible enough for people around to hear. So I just ignore him for a bit hoping it would die down. Hey most of us have that one song that just comes to mind and we just let out a lil tune. Anyway, this guy ain't most of us oh he just kept singing away like he hoped to get discovered by some talent scout just like in the movies.

Sorry mate, not today. For 2 reasons. (1) Not like I am a vocal coach or anything but I would say I have a good ear for music and my man, you cant sing to save your life. (2) It's almost 4pm on a Friday, nobody is interested in what your voice sounds like. We are only interested in making sure accounts are fed and finances withdrawn for the weekend not a freaking awfully sounding One-Man Live Band. Park well. 

With that being said, keep your talent within and wait for the appropriate time (which I doubt will ever present itself). I guess that was the drank thinking, it was the Freakin' WEEKEND after-all.

PEACE

LDV II.

A SAD DAY....... AND I CRIED

By now the world already knows about the tragic event that befell Nigeria yesterday afternoon. I, like most other people heard about the DANA plane crash in Lagos through the numerous BB staus messages. For a second I didnt want to believe it and I thought it was another mix up with the aircraft that crashed in Ghana a few days before. However my fears were confirmed when everyone's status seemed to convey the same message.

I quickly changed the channel from comedy central to the local channels and there I saw the caption flashing on the bottom of the screen. SAD DAY, GOD REST THEIR SOULS. Thats all I could do and say. Sad but I knew no one on that flight personally so it didnt hit home in ways that others felt it. A few minutes later, Architect Mike comes into the house and sees mumsie. She starts wailing, I'm confused now, have we lost someone close? I ask the butler whats wrong and he says that Aikhomu's son was on the same flight and he was probably dead. A cold chill, anger, sadness. His father, a good friend of my father passed away not long ago and now the first son has gone?

I pace around the house trying to take everything in, waiting for my dad to come back with more news....... emotions fading away now, I didnt know him like that, DAMN DANA AIRLINES...... At this point in time more gist about number dead, friends who lost friends and I am more angry and cursing at whoever is to blame. Back to fondling my blackberry, resolved to being a spectator.

Few hours later, there is a list of those who were on the ill fated flight from Abuja to Lagos floating around in the interweb and I get a copy posted to me. I decide to open it and look through the names after all I dont know anyone on it, if I did I would have been notified by now. So I thought anyway. Slowly go through the list of names and to my relief there is no name thats familiar to me... Thank GOD, but may the souls of all the departed be granted eternal peace.

Time now is about 12am monday morning and I get a message from my mum asking if I know if Adamu's name was on the list. I didnt reply cos I went back to sleep and I didnt know who she was refering to.
Woke up this morning and get to the office, sit at my desk and I'm ready for the days gist about the events that happened on sunday. I'm alone in the office very early and my bb alert sounds. Maybe more broadcasts. Alas it wasnt. It was a picture put up by my brother in the family group. And the caption read RIP ADO.

Which Ado is this? I look at the picture and its Ado, or Adamu (the one mum was asking about). Cant be the same one I know.... I was just with him in Vanilla on friday. Secondly, I didnt see his name on that list so how can he be......... U know what, I'll just check again. Grabbing my phone frantically, I go back to that list and go through each name carefully. There it is.....Adamu Bamaiyi..... my brother.... my friend. I didnt see your name earlier.... maybe I chose not to.

SADNESS, ANGER, PAIN, HATRED....... DAMN YOU DANA AIR. MANAGEMENT AND EVERYONE RESPONSIBLE. These felings are genuine this time..... It hits home and very hard. A tear rolls down my cheek as I read his name over and over. It becomes more as I remember the times we've sat and gisted, how he advised me when I needed someone to talk to. How he advised me when i needed to make my career decisions, how he talked me out of running back to jand when i had no job and everything looked so bleek. I remember vividly how so calm and nice this dude was, positive outlook on life. I remember how we celebrated when I told him I got a job and how we celebrated wen he said he too got the CBN gig.  As usual he gave me some reassuring words before we parted and I said to myself one day I'll show my appreiation.. hmmmm I guess he'll never get to know how much i appreciate him for everything.....

You have been a friend and a big brother to me, and I really can't say anything other than I pray that you end up in a better place. It is sad that you are no longer with us, you did not deserve to go in the way you did, no one does, but brother my prayers are with you and your family. I'm trying not to breakdown here in the office as I write this so I'm gonna stop here.

The world has lost an all round good dude.

RIP ADAMU BAMAIYI (ADO)
RIP BROTHER.

AEPB HAS MORE TO OFFER

Good morning peeps.
So on my way to work this morning, sitting in traffic and having my first stick of cigarette for the day, listening to Movado's Settle Down(Destiny) maaad tune by the way, looking forward to the day ahead. And then WHOOOSH!!!!! some dude hawking Orbit chewing gum and handkerchief's run past my window at break neck speed. Of course that could only mean one thing, he has spotted a truck of AEPB officials who were gonna come cart him off. But that isn't what tripped me. So I turn back to see how far away the truck was and it was at a considerable distance, surely there is no way they can catch up with this hawker.

Just as I am about to keep minding my business and keep my eyes ahead, I see these two of the AEPB official hop out the truck, cross the road and give chase. NOOOO FUCKING WAY, let it go boys, you cant possibly catch him. I'm talking he probably had 100 meters gap. But the chase was on like DONKEY KONG, the speed at which these guys went past my window was something to behold.

Said hawker had about 15 yards of freedom left this morning to either throw away his goods to stand a chance of escape or get nabbed. Its a hustle people, guess what option he chose? So 15 yards later, him and his goods get nabbed, he is being brought back to the truck by his belt led by our finest AEPB sprinters.

On my last drag of the smoke, I think to myself as I flick the butt of the benson on the highway,  we could recruit these guys for the up coming olympics. At least from the performance I saw I am sure we could comeout with a medal in the 100 meters sprint. No jokes. Bolt watch ur back. Not like i really care how well we do in the Olympics tho.

Y'all have a good day. Oh and it's the weekend too. SWEEEEEET!!!!!

A DETONATION ONE TOO MANY

So I woke up this morning and something felt weird. For once I did not go thru my usual ritual of going though my my bb updates, going thru all my usual websites (not calling names), did not bother putting on the tv to listen to music while I showered and got ready for work. Finally picked up my phone and couldnt come up with a status or a display picture to put so I just put up a black pic. Anyway fast forward a few hours later and I am already settled into the affairs of the day at  the office and I had to go to another floor to pick up some documents and just by the elevator there was this lady sitting on the staircase, looking somber and I coulda sworn she had tears in her eyes. My mama always told me to mind my business so I just ignored and did what I had to do. Ok my mama never thot me that but I just ignored before she thinks I want to toast her. Anyway I later go downstairs for a cigarette break and I see the same lady walking towards the gate. I over hear her say that there was a bomb blast at her office and I think to myself, surely she aint from afghanistan or the like. Definitely no bombs in Abuja cos its been quiet, a lot of security at every office, hotels, ministries, banks even my local mama put, Niger Delta restaurant or starch and banga as abuja residents call it has security there. So whats she talking about? Anyway cig break over and I make my way back to the office and there is a buzz around about a bomb blast at Thisday office in Mabushi then I look at my bb updates and yep, everyone is talking about it. Pictures abound, the work for the day is put on hold as we all deliberate, curse the usual suspects and sigh then we find out that there was another bomb blast in Kaduna too. More gossip, more bb updates, less work done.
So what happens next? Security is "beefed" up, the culprits chill for a while and we all go back to acting like nothing happened.

Dumb Movies annoy me

Just finished watching The Darkest Hour. It left me more confused than when I wrote my first Econometrics exam a few years ago. So the summary of this movie goes thus. A group of Americans (2 boys, 2 girls) go to Moscow for seperate reasons, the guys go for a business meeting which they end up getting 419'ed. And the babes are on holiday. Anyway they meet in a club which coincidentally the guy suggest to them through this new social networking site they created, (the business in which they get conned out of). So while grooving, "aliens" invade the world. Well I think they are aliens. And its this invisible, electric, pulsating force that zaps humans and turns them into dust (think War of the Worlds kinda zapping). The rude bastards, they didnt even ask to be taken to our leader., no demands made, i still dont know what hey came to earth for really. Anyway, they pretty much fuck up everyone in Moscow and make heroes out of these American youngins. And then just as the movie starts it ends with the few survivors escaping in a submarine to go somewhere else to teach other survivors around the world how to kill the invaders with some sort of microwave gun. Mind u, as they leave moscow, the aliens are still there using the city as fuel. so technically they little brats aint do shit. ok they killed a few of the aliens but damn it try and find the mother ship or something, gather alien intelligence punk bitches.  Thats it think. Maybe there will be a sequel who knows. Anyway bad review or not, I want my money back. Oh the highlight of the movie was when in one scene there was this lonesome barking alsatian who sees or senses the aliens and next thing...... yep, u guessed right. They zap the bloody dog. Come on, but why, I actually laughed to be honest.  The pup got it coming. Oh, last thing, so what gives the aliens away is light. So wen u see car's headlamp flicker or street light come on then the pricks are in the vicinity. And our heroes all wear light bulbs around their necks like dog tags.
Waste of time, if you havent seen it I suggest you do.