Hey World,
First of let me start with saying I don't particularly have any issues with banks per se. I just happen to have some of my weirdest thoughts and encounters while waiting in line at a bank. I guess because its so boring.
Anyhooos, with that being said I would like to get a few things I've noticed recently in banks off my chest.
For example, old farts talking and playing with kids. I mean total strangers. Now, there is the 'awww look how cute that child is' comment from afar. That's OK, there should be no touching, or carrying, or poking or down right playing with the child while their momma is doing a transaction. Dude you are one smile away from getting locked up Paedophile. If you must tell a kid how fine or cute they look I suggest you pay that compliment to the parent of the child. Parents tho, it really isn't ok for an adult to be all up in your child's business, he ain't doing you a favour, he ain't keeping the kid busy while you have your hands full. You sure wont give him your Ghana Must Go filled with money to look after would you?
Second thing I notice is that how come most female Bankers are Married or Engaged or Pregnant? Like are you kidding me? I have my theories tho but before I tell you, this is all I see when I enter a bank. Most of the female staff are spotting some kind of ring on their fingers even babes that ain't really that good looking. Yes, yes, I know, I sound horrible but trust me, next time you walk into any bank branch even if its in the remotest village possible you'll see pretty much every one with a ring or very pregnant.
My theory goes thus. Either majority of them just put on a ring of any kind on the ring finger before resuming work to ward of unnecessary suitors. Maybe Banks just happen to be Cupids love pit cos if you think about it a bank has all the recipe for marriage. Babes in tight pencil skirts, killer heels, the sound of money being counted but most importantly, bank statements and account balances. Already the small talk is eliminated, no one would refuse giving out numbers or receiving and so on.
So my advice for the day is this. Forget that fortune telling babalawo that says if you bring some farm animals, grain and any kind of tuber you are guaranteed marriage proposal, tell him to EFF off and just go to the bank. Guys you will need a healthy account tho if you wanna stand a chance at scoring. Trust me, the streets ain't smiling. So you better bring your A-Game. And ladies, if you want that man of your dreams that will cater and provide for you, go to the nearest bank and submit your CV. As for those looking to crooked pastors and their kind for babies I'm sure working in a bank is a better option than going to bar beach in the wee hours of the morning to bathe. Abi water board no dey supply your area. Enter bank, you'll be knocked up before you know it. Definitely better than sleeping with some loin cloth wearing dirty old man at least with the bank way you can tell what your offspring will be like. Give the little one a chance.
Disclaimer: I don't guarantee happiness oh, just saying that most people who happen to work in Banks hardly ever have a bare ring finger. Happiness is entirely up to you.
LDV II.
